In her latest Netflix comedy special, Relatable, Ellen DeGeneres shares a deeply personal and emotional story about losing her girlfriend in a devastating car crash during her early twenties. It's a moment that reshaped her life and left an indelible mark on her soul. “When I was 21, my world changed forever. My girlfriend was killed in a car accident. I actually passed the scene of the crash, not knowing it was her. The car wasn’t ours, and I didn’t realize what had happened until later,” Ellen, now 60, recounted during her stand-up routine. “I almost pulled over, but then the sirens came blaring behind me, so I kept going. It wasn’t until later that I found out it was her.”

After this unimaginable loss, Ellen's life took a drastic turn. “I couldn’t stay in the place we shared because I couldn’t afford it anymore. I had no job, no car, and no money. So, I moved into this tiny basement apartment. It was so small, you could barely stand up straight. There were only two rooms, and I slept on a mattress on the floor,” she explained. “And if that wasn’t bad enough, the entire basement was infested with fleas. They were everywhere. There I was, lying there, feeling this overwhelming sense of loss for the first person I ever truly loved, and all I could think about was how these fleas were still here. It made no sense. I was so angry at those fleas.”

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Yes, Ellen DeGeneres is returning to stand-up, and no, she doesn’t want to hold your baby. Her new special, Relatable, is set to premiere on December 18th. Get ready to laugh, cry, and feel all the feels.
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Ellen’s Journey Through Grief

This isn’t the first time Ellen has opened up about this tragedy. In an interview back in October 2015, she delved into the guilt she carried after her girlfriend’s death. “At that point, I’d never lost anyone close to me. Sure, my grandfather passed away when I was little, but I wasn’t close to him, and I didn’t even attend the funeral. But with my girlfriend, it was different. She was taken in a car accident, and we were living together at the time,” Ellen began, her voice tinged with emotion.

Ellen then revealed that she and her girlfriend had been arguing the night her girlfriend tragically passed away. “My brother’s band was performing that night, and my girlfriend and I had broken up. We were fighting a lot back then. She was trying to get me to come back home, but I acted like I couldn’t hear her over the music. I was planning to move back in, but I was trying to teach her a lesson. I stayed with some friends and acted like I couldn’t hear her, dismissing her completely,” the comedian admitted.

“She left before we did, and as we were driving home, we saw a car that had been split in two. We heard the sirens behind us, so we kept driving. There was nobody there yet, and it had just happened. The next morning, I found out it was her in that car,” Ellen continued. “I couldn’t stop thinking about how I should’ve gone home with her that night. Maybe she wouldn’t have been with that person if I had. I should’ve stopped… there were so many things running through my mind, and it left me with a lot of guilt.”

How Tragedy Shaped Ellen’s Perspective

Ellen shared how this tragic experience helped her grow and become a stronger person. “Losing her made me realize just how fragile life is. In an instant, she was gone, and that was really hard to process. It completely shifted my focus and changed the course of my life,” she said. “I learned that life can change in the blink of an eye, and it’s important to cherish every moment with the people you love.”